Back and Forth

This seems to be a theme in my life right now. I'm back in Otterburn - the cats at my (wonderful) friends' house were just too much for my immune system - and I'll be here until I leave in 36 days.

Which brings me to the other "back and forth" part of my life - moving to London. I keep thinking how things would be so much easier if I just stayed here and then I think that I would regret not going (possibly for the rest of my life)... What's a girl to do? No one can make the decision for me, but sometimes I wish there were someone to just tell me what to do. Not that I'd likely listen to them if there was!

So here is a pros and cons list to staying and leaving.

Pros to staying:

• I could set myself up in a nice apartment for WAY less.
• I would be close to my friends and family.

Cons to staying:

• I would always wonder "what if..."
• Finding a job in my field is more difficult here.
• I could get "comfortable" and forget about my dreams of seeing the world.

Pros to leaving:

• I'd get to live in one of the biggest most exciting cities in the world.
• I would never wonder "what if..."
• I can always just come back and settle if I want.
• My visa and flight cost me about $1000.
• I'd be fulfilling a life-long dream.

Cons to leaving:

• My money will be gone the instant I land.
• I will be in a foreign country (again) with no (real) support network.

I guess that I should go... I know that I will, it's just that when you have to wait so long to something so "crazy" you tend to start to wonder why you thought of doing it in the first place. I felt the same way for a few weeks (and especially days) before leaving for Korea, so I know this is part of the process... I just can't help thinking about it.

In other news...
My "cold" developed into something more fierce, but being away from the cats for a couple of days is helping. I hope to be 100% better in a few days.

My new "job" had no hours for me this week. Ya, that's right. I had to log in to a website today to choose my hours for next week and am now waiting on approval. I hope that I get something next week... if not I'm not sure what I'll do for money... though I am awaiting my tax returns...